I dreamed a dream...

This is another one of those 'ranty' posts. 


Sorry. 


I'm part of the younger generation that people seem to have no faith in. 


I'm at University, I have good GCSE and A Level results, I'm going to have a career when I finish Uni. WHAT ELSE DO YOU WANT FROM ME? 


 I'm not going to spend my entire life looking for a job... Fair enough, I'm going into one of the trickiest possible careers, but at least I'm not slouching on my sofa watching Jeremy Kyle... Or applying for the show. 


This is one of the things that annoy me.. 


I try really hard at everything I do, but get very little recognition for my hard work. Sometimes, just getting constructive criticism is nice, because at least you know they took the time to notice you. 


But then you see people who get praised for doing stupid things; the sort of thing that, if normal people like me did, people would look at you with a 'You want praise for that? What are you, 5?' look. 


It was always like that at High School.


I was always the 'average' kid. I wasn't amazing at anything, but I was doing well enough to get by. So I never got noticed by the teachers. The only time teachers took notice of me was when I did something dreadful: Like the time I hit a girl on a bus on a school trip in year 7. Or when, in year 10, when I was so angry at one of my P.E. teachers for making me play a game I didn't want to, then forcing me to carry on playing that I used swear words and stormed out. Yeah, I was a rebel. 


Other than that, I just blended in with the furniture. I even went back for Work Experience in year 12, and the only teachers who recognized me were my old RE teacher, a couple of teachers and assistants and my year 8 german teacher, who left half way through the year, when I was actually doing well at German. SHE HADN'T TAUGHT ME FOR 4 YEARS AND REMEMBERED ME. None of my favorite teachers recognized me unless I went out of my way to introduce myself. I literally felt gutted. I'd been gone from the school about 9 months and barely anyone remembered me. It's as if I'd been invisible for the 5 years I was there. 


So, that got me thinking. 


I need to make an impression. I need people to remember me. 


I'm fed up of being average. Fed up of blending in. 


Of course, half way through 6th form wasn't the place to make this epiphany, because most people didn't care about you if you hadn't made an impression by the 3rd week into the first term. 


So, University was the place I needed to make myself noticed. 


I needed to find my feet in the career path that I wanted to take and make sure I pursued it. 


That's what I'm doing. 


(I'm finally getting to my point, I promise.) 


Ever since I was little, I've loved performing. Singing, dancing, acting. EVERYTHING. 


And, I know it sounds lame, but that's all I've ever wanted to do. It's what I've always thought I was good at, even if I've never really approached it the right way. I used to be really pushy and arrogant, no seriously. But, now, I'm trying to be a better person, even though I've made mistakes before. 


I've never really been confident with my singing voice, or my acting skills... (But I've got wicked Dance moves. Just saying.) So, I'm going to try so hard to become what I've always wanted. A musical theatre performer, and to perform in musicals to entertain and to encourage other people to follow their dreams. Oh, God I sound cheesy.  


And, just for the record, my dream role would probably be Eponine or Fantine in Les Mis... I know, Cliche. But, they're such amazing characters. And they're solo songs are just... NOM. 


To finish my post, I'm going to use the title of the blog as a clue to the song at the end of the post... 


ENJOY. 


Be fabulous. 

Lea Salonga - I Dreamed a Dream - Les Miserables 25th Anniversary Concert